Back Three Years Later

Wednesday, June 30th, I got up at 4am to catch a plane for Italy.
It's been three years since the last time I was in this country, a place I called home for 18 years.
It feels really weird.
When I first learned, back in May, that I was really going to Italy, I had been so excited. In fact, everyone at my birthday party witnessed my tears that automatically started pouring down my face when my parents presented me with the "We're all sending you to Italy" envelope which contained the money for my trip. Then, about a week or more before the date of my trip, I suddenly didn't want to go anymore. For some odd reason I was nervous and dreaded going, which was really strange and didn't make sense.
Coming back here, however, has been really good. It's nice to see all (well, most of all) my friends and to be in this beautiful country once again with its crazy culture and delicious food (I'm sorry my Portuguese friends, but I have to say that I prefer Italian cuisine to that of your country).
But as I said before, it's been weird. I'm re-experiencing all the good and bad parts of this country that I had forgotten; everything seems more or less the same since I left; and I often feel like such a stranger here.
Going from Portugal to Italy, these were the first things I noticed (though I already knew all of these things before):
_Many times, Italians don't know what the meaning of "standing in line and waiting for your turn" is and they just butt in, causing the line to seem more "pear-shaped" rather "than stick-shaped", if that makes any sense. (Thank you Portuguese people for knowing what lines are for!)
_Italians are a lot louder than the Portuguese
_Italians care a lot more about their image than the Portuguese and everyone looks the same here, whereas Portugal has a much more diverse population.

_When Italians greet you, they start by kissing you on the right side, while the Portuguese start on the left side. I, of course, have gotten used to the latter and therefore have run into a few awkward moments with some people haha
_Italians don't respect cross walks. Therefore, when you want to cross a street, you either wait or you just run out when it seems like a good time (I've done this many times and people who have never been in Italy always think I'm insane haha)
_Oh man, have I missed this food! =P

I'm also really appreciating the fact that in (Northern) Italy people are mostly punctual and if they're late, it's only a matter of minutes - half an hour, at most. It's SO NICE to be able to count on people to do what's been planned at around the time you agreed on, instead of TWO HOURS LATER, which is a common thing in Portugal!
I have also really enjoyed being able to understand everything that everyone around me is saying without difficulties and being able to easily communicate with people! At first my Italian was pretty rusty, but now after some days I feel pretty confident while I speak (though I still get confused with Portuguese and English sometimes).
It's so nice to speak Italian again! =)

Things have changed though. I have changed. My friends are now very different from me and they lead lives unlike my own. I guess this could make me sad, and it probably would have before, but I'm just enjoying being with them and enjoying listening to what they're up to and catching up with them a litte.
It's acutally really nice to realize, once again, that I am not the same person I used to be before I left Italy, and it's such a relief!
I used to want to be like everyone else; now I've embraced the fact that I am and always will be different. I used to be so negative and carried such heavy emotions inside that I never felt free and light and content the way I do now. I used to visit my friends and think the whole time about how hard it was going to be to leave them again, how much I didn't want to leave, how sad, jealous, and angry I was that my friends had a good life and I wasn't really part of it. This time, I'm enjoying the time I have with them, I'm glad that I'm leading the life I am, and I don't really have bad feelings about saying goodbye. Even though I'm not really part of their lives anymore, I know that I will see my friends again and I know that I'm going to have such a great time in the next adventures I have ahead of me! And when I'll come back, it'll probably be like this time: I'll share about all the things I've done, they'll tell me about what's been going on in their lives, things here will probably still be more or less the same and our friendships will hopefully still be existant. I do have to admit that out of all my relationships in Italy, few of them can still be called "friendships". Since we hardly ever hear from each other when I'm away and I've become even more different from them than I used to be, most of my friends have now become more like acquaintances. Even so, I still enjoy seeing them and hanging out with them when I come around to visit every once in a while. (When I lived in Italy I'd see them about once or twice a year, but now three years have passed since the last time and who knows how long it will be till next time.)
But hey, this is all part of the adventure of being an international kid, right? ;-)

When I get back to Portugal I'll write more about my trip here in Italy.
Till next time!